Excuse me, waiter? There's a unicycle in my chicken...

For those of you who have been to Bangkok and revelled in it's insanity, you'll completely understand this story.To those of you who have not yet experienced the madness that Bangkok has to offer, allow me to enlighten you briefly and put this story into context so that it makes sense. Bangkok is insane. It is really one of the craziest places I have ever experienced. It has every kind of transport on the road that you can imagine. 1 wheel, 2 wheels, 3 wheels, sometimes 4. The people are crazy. And their pets are even crazier. Never before had I ever seen a dog wearing dungarees and booties and sunglasses. But that's just the sort of place this is. And if you stop and stare for too long, you will more than likely get hit by one of the afore mentioned modes of transport. So, to sum it up. It's crazy, and nothing is as simple as it seems.

Last week Kyle and I were invited to attend a collegue's birthday dinner at the "Flying chicken" restaurant. Thinking that the name was just another poorly translated title, we accepted. We arrived at this restaurant a little bit earlier than everybody else, as usual, and scoped the place out. It looked like quite a snazzy place...but only if you didn't count the poor soul on the karaoke stage producing some of the vilest notes I'd ever heard, with a dead pan expression on her soul less face. (I thought karaoke was supposed to be fun?!) On closer inspection of our surroundings, we noticed what looked like a stage with a couple of ramps on either end in the middle of the restaurant. There was a catapult at the one end. Quite a grand one too, I might add. It looked like something from an 18th century war museum. Still, we thought nothing of this, as Thai people are, at times, unbearably strange and inexplicable. 

We browsed the extensive menu at our leisure, making sure we drank lots of beer in the mean time. Kyle and I ordered the "fly chicken", a baby chicken, to share. Little did we know what became of ordering the "fly chicken".... As our food began arriving, a man made his way up to the podium and began ringing a bell. Obviously this attracted our attention away from the terrible vocals on the karaoke stage. That, and the man walking around making chicken noises into a microphone with a rubber chicken.

The man at the podium rang the bell like there was no tomorrow, at the same time loading what appeared to be a cooked chicken into the catapult...are we worried yet? What came next blew my mind. It seemed that the ringing bell attracted a teenager on a unicycle who came speeding up the ramp and up onto the podium (I repeat: on a unicycle.)He was dressed very strangely and his head gear consisted of a helmet with a large spike at the top of it. As the unicyclist got closer to the catapult, it was let off and the chicken went flying through the air...and landed straight on this kid's head!!!!! I could not believe my eyes!!! Was this why it was called "fly chicken"? I believe so! More! We wanted more!! Somewhat of a spectacle followed this mad chicken flying act: this young boy continued to do tricks on his unicycle, going up and down the ramp and jumping from beam to beam like something out of Takeshi's castle. He also showed off some more of his catching skills by catching an array of items, flying from the catapult, on his head. He started big, obviously with the flying chicken, and continued to get smaller until he was literally catching what looked like a single grape on the spoke on his head. It was unreal. Such talent. Well, until he had to catch our chicken. That didn't fly too well. He missed and our chicken lay shattered on the floor. We then had to wait while they quickly cooked up another one and gave it another go. It was ok, at least there was some decent entertainment going on. The chicken was delicious, by the way.

The fact that this restaurant is clearly run by a lunatic is not the point, the point is that, at some stage, someone created this restaurant. It's been running for 27 years. That means that there has been a fair share of madmen riding up that ramp and catching those flying chickens. At some stage, someone thought to themself: "I am going to open a restaurant. It will serve every type of Thai food you can imagine. But I need a gimmick...hmmm....What shall it be? I know! I have a friend in the circus who can ride a unicycle who can catch things on his head! Perhaps I can train him to catch chickens on his head! And I have another friend who fought in the Roman war who is particularly handy with a catapult, so he shall be hired too! My restaurant will serve flying chickens caught by a daredevil! It will be amazing! And I will throw in a karaoke bar to ensure that all Asian people come to my fine restaurant." I can only assume that this is the way that this restaurant came about.

It was fun. And bizarre. And I chomped on a frog leg that was rather delicious yet quite bony. You should go there.Apparently they give patrons a chance to try their luck up on the podium, I didn't go though, I can't ride a unicycle. Or catch flying chickens on my head, for that matter.
I've been informed that there are a number of wierd and wonderful restaurants in the area, including one with waiters wearing traditional Chinese dress and roller blades. And a robot restaurant. I think I'll go there. Watch this space.