A tribute to the 90's

The 90's was a great era. So youthful (well, depending on your age, I suppose....) So full of pop, teased hair, and swing tops with impossibly high necklines that made even a 10 year old look preggers. I loved the 90's for so many reasons, it was the prime of my life really (aged 2-12 years)


You were all there at some stage (except you,you baby prostitute who is only 12 years old, go away from my blog)


Here are a few things that caused me to reminesce and write this blog because they are just too boss to be forgotten....


Tamagotchi's: These were amazing. Tiny computerized animals that had all the same needs and functions of a human. They had to shit, eat, sleep and be loved just like us. Oh how we can learn from our beloved tamagotchi's! I never had one. My mom told me they were stupid, so I used to get to look after all my friends' tamagotchi's when they had their own needs to take care of (eat,shit, sleep etc) it was all fun and games until they started to go out of fashion and I had to drop out of school to take care of all the kids. You know how it is...they grow up so fast!

Hankerchief crop tops: Remember those tops made out of spandex which only covered the front half of your body and was held together by that bungy cord-type elastic at the back? Loved those things. They didn't love me though. I distinctly remember wearing one to the grade 7 "disco" and thinking I was kak hot. Until I walked past a group of boys and one shouted "ah sick!!!" And another started throwing up. At first I put the incident down to them being exposed to something really gross or participating in underage drinking at the disco, but the more I think about it, the more I recall that the "gross thing" was actually me in a back-less 'kerchief top.....just the kind of push you need when you're a 13 year old girl with body issues and a bit more hair than the rest of her peers.


Disco's: ah Discos. The best. Such a stressful time for a teenager. You planned your outfit months ahead, then on the date  had to stay home all day from school feigning sickness so you could get ready. You know, iron your hair (with an iron, there were no such things as ghd's), or plait your hair early in the morning and spend the day wearing corn rows and talking black so you could have desirable curls at night (ahem ,Kenny....), shaving your 3 armpit hairs, experimenting kissing techniques on your pillow/hand/mirror/dog to perfect your style in case you got lucky and trying on a variety of combinations of outfits before falling to a heap on the floor crying that you were ugly and had nothing to wear. All of this and its only 1pm. "Oh God no! Only 5 hours to get ready for the disco! How much time I have wasted!" Cue another distressing episode of crying and personal attacks. Then when you eventually got to the sad disco: you twisted your ankle because you were wearing platform shoes, you drank too much Oros and got that suspicious orange ring around your mouth, and no one asked you to dance. What a disappointing night.Couldn't wait to do it all over again the next year.


Roller discos: Same as above, but involves knee pads, roller blades and hands and knees covered in gravel and blood.

A series of crap and unsuccessful boy/girl bands: We all loved them. We all knew the words to their songs. We all had a fantasy about hooking up with Nick Carter, (Then being gutted when he leapt out of the closet, even though we secretly knew the whole time). We all made our parents spend their hard earned cash on Platform "Spice" Shoes (as well as all the other products in their wide range), just so that we could put out hair into pigtails and pretend to be "Baby Spice" or whatever the hell her name was. Why the crap names? "Scary Spice"? "Sporty Spice"? "Posh Spice"? "Sexy Spice"? Bloody hell, they could sure as hell give Robertsons a run for their money with all their bloody spices. And what was the deal with the boy bands? Talking about crap names, here's just a few to make you question the musical talent of society:

• N*SYNC
• Boyz II Men
• West Life?
• Backstreet Boys (Ummmmm....what back street are you talking about here?)
• Aqua
• Venga Boyz
• All Saints

  






                       VS.














Gelled fringes and Hawaiin shirts: Need I say more about this combination?


To conclude, it must be noted that the 90's was a fantastic decade. So fun-filled and brightly coloured, with a constant Spice girls / Back street boys soundtrack in the backround. How fitting.